Thursday, June 09, 2005
lolx.. bloggin again.. went out wif pei yi todae.. took neoprintx.. SO NICE~~ lolx.. and bought 2 necklace.. one is a wooden dragonfly.. super NEAT!!! and the other one is black.. a bit like those kinda pebbles.. feels cool.. hahax.. veli high.. i'm countin down to the daes i'll finalli be OUT of singapore.. so happi.. I MISS CHINA!!! i'm lyk FINALLY going back.. i miss china's AIR!!! the pure sense of belonging when you finally step onto that huge piece of beautiful land.. the scent of the soil there just blows you away.. i LOVE that place.. i cant wait.. can i leave lyk now or something.. hahax.. but the trip would be really hectic lahx.. haf 2 visit a huge number of places within a VERY short time frame.. cuz i onli going back for a week this time.. all my mum's fault.. and mi dad's.. cuz they too busy.. then no time bring mi back.. SOB!!! actually i seriously have no idea why i lyk china so much.. maybe becoz all my memories there were so pure and innocent.. just plain BLISS.. i mean.. i was onli there until 5 lorx.. its lyk.. how complicated can a 5 year old kid get rite.. thats why.. all the memories were so sweet.. not like in sing.. the complications.. the faces.. the masks.. the terror.. the anger.. and the pain.. everythin.. how i wish i can go back to china for good.. then i can start all over.. lyk hardly anyone knows me there.. other than that handful.. but even then they dun know how i've been in sing.. so i dun have to pretend in front of them.. no expectations to live up to.. i can just do wad i want.. laugh when i want to.. cry when i cant stand the pain.. in here i cant.. keep havin the feelin that i dun belong.. sometimes there's even this sense of inferity.. just cuz in you boils a totally different kinda blood.. i am DIFFERENT.. but hey.. i cant deny.. i LOVE being different.. lolx.. i'm PROUD to be who i am.. hahax.. one reason why i particularly liked that dragonfly necklace.. because its wooden.. becoz it;s handmade.. its so exquisite.. it looks as if its flyin.. it looks so free.. suddenly realised i had been slackin the whole of the holidaes.. realised i cant work without stress.. sigh.. thats why i'm a pure I.. hahax.. read this story.. wrote it and cried.. its stupid.. you write it and you cry becoz you wrote it.. hahax..便条上的故事
很早，他就和她同厂，他是三班倒的工作，她也是，一个月里，只有几天能轮在一个时间段上休息。刚结婚，厂里没房子，住的是集体宿舍一间极小的房子，卫生间、厨房都是公用的。 他早上8点半下班，她8点已经去上班，他回到家桌子上有一张便条：馒头在锅里，趁热吃，抓紧时间休息。下面落的是她的大名。揭开锅盖，馒头还热着。 下午6点半，她下班，他已经走了，桌子上的老地方又有一张便条：晚餐是大饼和粥，还有一碟腐乳，一定要吃完，我去菜市场买菜了。后面是他的姓名。一个钟头后，他回来了，手里拎着蔫蔫的蔬菜。“很宜”。他说完，急匆匆穿上那件蓝色的劳动工作服上班去了。这一天，见面只有两分钟。 添了三个孩子，终于分到一套带厨房的一室一厅，卫生间和洗涮的水龙头仍是公用的，很满足了。仍是三班倒的工作，孩子是大的带小的，她早上8点半下班，他怕孩子们把便条拿来折纸飞机，于是把便条留在碗厨顶上：锅里有煮好的甜酒粥，吃了就休息。我已给大娃说好，让他带弟弟妹妹出去玩。大娃是他们的大孩子。 下午6点半，他下班，饭桌上只有二娃、三娃在等他。他知道，她一定是趁菜市收摊去买廉价的菜。果真，一会儿大娃抱着一堆蔬菜，还有几只小鸡回来，说妈妈上班去了，拿出妈妈用一张报纸边匆匆写的便条：这几只小母鸡养大后就可以少买鸡蛋了。落款仍是她的大名。 一晃，孩子们都张大成家了，他和她几十年的三班倒，也终于到了尽头。退休后的生活虽然可以天天见面，但却更忙了，因为添了三个孙子。一早，她和一堆老大妈们去锻炼身体，回来时做早餐，把孙子送到学校上课，接着去赶早市买最新鲜的蔬菜。他醒来，冰箱上有张便条：高压锅里有鸡血粥，听说可以治肺病，你多吃点。他很听话的喝完了鸡血粥，然后留张便条，就慢慢逛到花鸟市场。她回来，习惯地看一眼冰箱，上面有张条：我逛花鸟市场了，中午晚点回来，你先吃，别等我。果真，下午1点，他才逛回来。手里拿着从乡下郎中那里买的治她关节炎的草根根…… 秋冬之季，他去菜市场时突发脑溢血而逝，非常突然。一辈子，他走哪里都要留张便条给她，这一次，他却没来得及告诉她一声。四天四夜，她都想不通，第五天，孩子们喊她吃饭，却发现，她睡在床上已经仙逝了。 在他们老式的衣柜里，满满一大袋的便条，什么样的纸张，什么样的形状都有，淡淡的，都是些琐碎的事，一张张看完，让人泪流满面。
i think.. thats true love.. when you dun even have to show it anymore.. when two ppl dun have the slightest doubt of each other's feelings.. when even if one dae you just see him for two minutes and yet you know that he loves you.. and you cant help but just think of him and try your very best to do things for him.. and these actions are recipocrated.. i mean.. just a few slips of paper.. simple everydae words.. no fancyful "i love you"s.. no empty promises.. no fake actions.. just so pure.. so true.. thats love.. thats true love.. when one leaves.. the other just follows.. its almost natural.. as if they are one.. one dies and the other is just left with half of herself.. cuz the other half has left.. so she leaves too.. almost unintentionally.. almost as if.. its fated.. as if.. sigh.. i dun know..but i now i swear i'm back to normal le.. i got used to it.. so congratualtions myself.. i got over him.. hahax.. so now.. i am myself again.. officially myself..
these few daes very crazy abt agartha christie's mystery books.. dunno why.. just feel that they are so unexpected.. the endings.. no matter how i guess.. i just cant get to the right person.. sigh.. she is so smart.. hahax..
还没好好的感受
雪花绽放的气候
我们一起颤抖
会更明白
什么是温柔
还没跟你牵著手
走过荒芜的沙丘
可能从此以後
学会珍惜
天长和地久
有时候
有时候
我会相信一切有尽头
相聚离开
都有时候
没有什么
会永垂不朽
可是我
有时候
宁愿选择留恋不放手
等到风景都看透
也许你会陪我看细水长流
(music)
还没为你把红豆
熬成缠绵的伤口
然後一起分享
会更明白
相思的哀愁
还没好好的感受
醒著亲吻的温柔
可能在我左右
你才追
求孤独的自由
有时候
有时候
我会相信一切有尽头
相聚离开
都有时候
没有什么会永垂不朽
可是我
有时候
宁愿选择留恋不放手
等到风景都看透
也许你会陪我看细水长流
(music)
有时候有时候
我会相信一切有尽头
相聚离开
都有时候
没有什么会永垂不朽
可是我有时候
宁愿选择留恋不放手
等到风景都看透
也许你会陪我看细水长流.....
hahax.. suddenli thought of this song.. dunno why.. so long le.. but i like.. suddenli realised i have grown an unknowing loving for night time.. its so late le.. but i'm suddenly so awake.. i think there's something wrong wif me.. i sleep lyk 2-3 hours a dae and i love it.. hahax.. i'm crazy le.. sigh.. i swear i will finish all my hw by hook or by crook this week.. i solemly SWEAR!!! hahax... so.. nothin else le lahx.. joy to the worldx.. i love myself.. lolx.. nitez ppl.. even though i still dun intend to sleep yet.. the nite is still young babe!! hahax.. and btw ppl.. if you ppl cant read the text.. just go VIEW.. then go ENCODING.. then press UNICODE.. then can read le.. hahax.. cheers!!!
Q~ ♥
6/09/2005 01:30:00 AM
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